It was a strange day in December.
Because of the abnormal weather, it was warmer than spring.

So I stood there for a long time than usual. It was the weather that I missed for a long time

This is... probably It must have been because I stood next to the tree for a long time.

For your information, I had a fear of spiders. Seriously.
I was frozen for at least 30 seconds and couldn't do anything.

This would be the first experience in my life that I've ever had a spider in my hand😂😭
At that time, I was so busy with work that I didn't even have time to throw him in the trash.

In the meantime, it took me a while to calm down my surprised chest and I had to check if I had peed. I was going to abandon this guy as soon as possible.

The problem was that after four hours, I got some time to rest, but the sun was already setting and the weather was suddenly dropping below zero. 🥶😂

I had to give up my courage and choose whether to throw this creature out in the cold, in the trash, or take him home.

I was thinking about what to do with it, and when I asked the pet shop, they told me to throw it away because it was too small to keep.😂😂

Hearing that, I suddenly started to have a will💪😡😡😡😤😤
So I decided to try a challenge that seemed impossible. 😭😭
So I went to the mart and looked for things that could be his home.

After paying $30, a decent house was built.

I almost died screaming again while putting him in the house💀, but I started living with him anyway.

Going to a community full of spider pictures to ask spider owners how to raise them, and giving a spider his food was also too disgusting at first, and it wasn't easy.

I even felt nauseous while eating snacks next to his small house

He got a little bigger in a month. As much as he grew, so did I.
Before I knew it,
I wasn't afraid to watch a spider from the side

I decided to take more courage and touch him.

But he never allowed me to touch him.
He dodged between my fingers as if he were annoyed.🥺🥺

About this time, I heard one thing from the person who raised similar spider. That his life is numbered.

He was a kind of spider that was born in the spring and die before the end of the spring.

I think the reason why he ate less and went around more actively every day was because his days were numbered.

Sometimes I'd put him on my hands. I wasn't afraid of that anymore.
However, to avoid him getting stressed, I put him on my hands for a while only during the time I fed him. ❤️❤️

The pictures and emoticons in my cell phone started to fill with spiders.

I finally understood why pet owners' phones are full of animals.😂😂

April was approaching. It's time for his kind to be born and active.
He's been alive for as long as four months.

I think it's a little more long than the spider breeders expected.

There wasn't much time that the world gave us. I'm starting to get nervous. I said I'd give money to someone who would find his mate spiders everywhere.

One wish for me was for him to meet his partner and return to nature.

Then one day he didn't eat any more.
I put the meal close to him, but he hesitated for a moment, and then just ate little food.

As soon as I got home from work, I couldn't see him walking around, so I carefully looked inside his nest outside the window.

He looked like he was alive. His eyes were shining brightly as if he were looking up at the sun.

But time passed and he didn't move.
I touched him with an ominous heart, and he stood still without any sign of surprise.

I went to the spider community and asked if he was taking off his skin like he used to, but one expert said.


"No, last time was his last. He doesn't take his shirt off anymore. I think he's dead."

I couldn't sleep well for a few days. He didn't appear in my dream. But every time I saw an empty cage, my heart felt so empty that I would sometimes open it.

I buried him by the tree.

Although it was a series of coincidences, I was able to overcome the spider phobia that I had feared for 30 years. And for a while, I became interested in their world.

I felt like he was telling me.

Go through anything. try overcome your fear and you'll see a new universe.

A friend told me when I was depressed for a few days.

You didn't kill him like that.
Rather, thanks to you, he was able to live four more months in a crisis that almost killed him.

But I still feel sad when I think of him.
Even though he was very small, he gave me more than I gave him.